Hi, I'm Dani Tan and if you are here, you are in the right place. Welcome to the Pivot and Promotion podcast where we say forget the rules because they weren't written for us. I'm Danny Tan. I'm your host as well as career and leadership coach and a proud advocate for redefining what success and leadership looks like. And here's what I know. You can lead at any level. You can pivot at any age, any. You can make moves that feel right for you. Whether you're climbing the corporate ladder, starting something completely new, or just figuring out your next step. I've got you covered with strategies, stories and straight up inspiration. So let's make some moves. Okay, so today we're going to be talking about how to lead with authority without doing everything yourself.

So maybe you are a veteran to leadership, but you're starting to realize that you're picking up everything. Or maybe you're new to leadership and you're going from an individual contributor to a first time manager. Or maybe you just need a little reminder that being a leader does not necessarily mean doing everything yourself and there's a reason why there are teams and support systems there for you. So let's go ahead and talk a little bit about how to lead with authority and without doing everything. So a little bit behind the scenes of me and what I have done is that I've worked on many different teams. When it comes to building out teams, I went from being a sample coordinator to a VP of a multibillion dollar company.

And within that, I was going and building out different teams on all different kinds of levels, from small organizations that are startups, from bigger organizations and corporations, to the work that I do now when it comes to helping leaders support and build their teams and develop their leadership. So let's go ahead and dive in. All right, so going in to today's session, the thing that I want you to kind of think about is doing more is not the answer. Doing more isn't the answer whatsoever. And I will be repeating this over and over and over again throughout this session that more does not mean more. Sometimes it actually means less. And so intentionality is so important when you are leading teams, when you're leading yourself in so many different ways.

A lot of the times if you are stepping into leadership or let's just say you kind of like throw everything out the window, you will start to feel like you are torn between I want to be a really good leader, I want to lead well and I want to be respected and I want things done right, but you are somehow taking on more and more, more tasks. And so there is this paradox when it comes to leadership of, you know, you feel like doing everything means that you're getting everything done and that you're developing your leadership. Because look at me, I'm getting so much done and I'm taking initiative. But also what you're actually doing is working against your own authority. Because now you are just a person who can execute and do things.

But we actually need is for you to cultivate so many other skills when it comes to building authority, building trust, helping people feel like they have more autonomy. So let's dive in. So if you are a high performer and you're like, oh, oh my gosh, but I just got this promotion, I just got this leadership position, or I'm just so used to doing well and doing the best, you may see that it's hard for you to let go of the fact of being relied on. You have built your reputation of being really good at what you do. From being super reliable, you have built your credibility. You are like, oh my gosh, I get things done, I do things well. And so you have this expectation set of yourself and this reputation set.

So it's really hard when you're going from being that high performer, individual doer to being somebody's going to be a manager and leader, that you have to actually learn to depend on other people. There's also this factor with fear when it comes to, oh my gosh, if I let go of the projects and I'm not doing everything and I give it to somebody else, how will I know it's done well? How will I know it's done appropriately? Oh, my gosh, all my job is is to manage people and lead them. I'm not actually executing the work myself. Am I going to seem lazy? That I'm not doing enough? Will I start to forget how things are done? All these thoughts start to come up and then at the end of the day, you're kind of and really honestly used to proving your worth through doing things.

And when you are new to leadership or new manager, you're kind of like, oh my gosh, but I need to be involved still. How will I still stay relevant? They may not need me at that point. And so I just want you to remember that what made you successful as an individual contributor is not necessarily what's going to give you authority and make you a strong leader. Now you're about to find a new set of skills. So that was great then, but now it's something to look at in a different lens. And this is especially, especially true for my first and second gen folks, for my women of color, we are so used to being the go to for everything. We are the go to for everything within our friends, within our family, within our work, in our teams, with our bosses.

And so we're so used to being the executor, the doer, the one that gets things done, the one that makes things happen, the problem solver for every single department, for every single, you know, Thea, Theo, like, you know, cousins, parents. And so this is what I want you to know. When you're stepping into leadership, which you have been doing, it is now your time to start to let this melt off you of that. You have to get everything done. Now. There's different sets of skills that you're going to develop in order to build this authority around yourself as a leader. And so the difference between control and authority, this is what I want you to kind of remember, is that control comes from doing checking, staying close to every single detail and making sure there's execution at every single step.

Like I want to be in control to make sure it's executed a certain way. That is one piece. Then there's authority. Authority comes from being really clear, giving strategic direction, having trust and setting a vision and empowering others to help execute. So if you are a leader, you don't have to touch every single little thing that is being done and executed for it to be done. Your job now is to make decisions, to set the priorities and the vision and to make sure there's alignment across all the people that are working on this. I always say to, you know, folks, think about a CEO of a company. Do you think the CEO of the company is in every single little thing, touching every single little thing, helping every single person on every single little piece that rolls up to the company's mission of the CEO is not doing that.

They are setting the vision, they are setting the mission and they are saying what needs to be done within what timelines and people execute. And so that is the difference between having authority versus having control. Control and so being able to know the difference. This is what happens is if you continue to allow yourself to be the go to for everything, you create a dependency trap. So you're going to be in a vicious cycle of dependency where one everyone that you know you will have set the tone, that you're the one that's going to do it, you're the one that's going to get it done. And that does not help anyone because one that's not going to help you flourish as a leader, to develop your authority, to be able to continue to grow and succeed as a leader.

And also it's not going help your team. So your team will also become dependent on you the same way your cross functional team members and partners are. And so you need to be able to allow your team to grow and learn and let them allow themselves to problem solve, to learn that they're capable to have some autonomy. And so you don't want to create this dependency on yourself, which is why you should not do it yourself all the time. And you also, you're going to get stuck in the weeds like leaders should not be in the details of the tactical day to day. You're supposed to be there to create the strategy, the vision, be able to see what the future plan is. That way the team can roll up into that.

And then it doesn't create space for you to think, think about the times as an individual contributor and executing things. How many times your manager probably said to you before you got your promotion or you stepped into your first leadership role, hey, it's really important for you to be able to focus on strategy. It's really important for you to share your pov. It's hard to do that if you are constantly in the weeds of execution, still helping folks with things. And so I just want you to in so many ways is that if everything runs through you on your team, you're probably the bottleneck, you're probably slowing things down in some way, shape or form. If everything has to be finalized and approved and reviewed by you, there are ways to do it that makes sense without completely burning you out, burning your team out as well as just making sure that you have time and space for strategy.

You're not creating dependency on yourself and you're not getting stuck in the tactical. These are all important things. I have one client who everything had to be run by her. She actually was on a new time leader whatsoever. She's a very seasoned leader, but she was very worried about adopting this new team and worrying about, okay, now that I have this new team that maybe isn't performing as well. She just wanted to make sure that they were going to improve their performance. She didn't want it to be known that she had this team that was underperforming and then it was going to affect her reputation and what it is that she was doing. So versus maybe taking the time to mentor and coach them.

She was actually just getting into the Trenches with them trying to execute stuff which disempowered them, didn't develop or train them, and then create a dependency that she was going to get it done. And so knowing that the conversation that we had was how can you take a step back and understand what they need in order to help empower them and essentially activate them in a way that makes sense. So let's go ahead and talk a little bit more. So, so what authority looks like, so what it does not look like is micromanaging every detail, disappearing, you know, into all the things that are happening and then trusting without structure. Like you can't just say, like I don't want you to think authority is like, oh, I trust you, so now you do it.

No, like you have to be able to trust people and empower them. You have to give them structure and support. That's definitely your job and your responsibility. I think the same thing with my clients. Like my responsibility in the relationship is to give structure and support where was needed for them to achieve the vision and the goals that they have set for themselves. And so knowing that that is where that comes from, what authority looks like when you are leading is you're having clear boundaries and expectations of what is wanted. So you're setting expectations of what this person is, what your team members are going to go ahead and achieve and you're making very strong and timely decisions.

So the big strategy decisions that need to be, you know, decided for them to move forward, you help with that. Instead of just solving problems for them, you ask them questions and coach them to see what solutions they potentially have to help empower them. And then you let people also come to their own solutions and outcomes versus just always laying it out there for them. So I had one client who was a first time manager and she was saying that, you know, her team doesn't necessarily feel super motivated. One person's having issues with development, the other person's doing really well, but it's really inconsistent across the board. And so she says she's always in there, she's jumping, she's helping, she's rolling her sleeves.

And so one of the questions I asked her was, okay, so it sounds like whenever there's a problem, you're there and you're ready. But if they feel like they're all at different levels when it comes to how they show up to work and how they contribute and what they're good at, whenever there is an issue, do you open up the question for them and ask them, hey, you know, based off of what's going up on the issue that's happening, what would you recommend? Because they're closest to it, right? Like, once you start to move up, you're not as in the weeds anymore. And she said, no, usually I come with a solution. And so the biggest things in like the smallest shift of like creating authority and not doing everything is asking the question to those who are in that role, hey, what do you think would be the best solution for this?

What do you recommend? Being closer to it. And then of course, if they get stuck, if they're unsure, working that through with them, yes, I'm sure you have the answer at the end of the day. But helping them start to build that confidence for themselves and helping them build that belief in themselves as well helps you in the long run develop this person, but also create authority for yourself versus executing everything. And so how can you shift something in your relationship with a team that you work with of either asking questions or prompting versus doing everything first? And so the biggest shift that I see within leaders, what they're making, is that they have to realize that building authority and building your leadership does not come from being busy one more time.

Building authority and being a leader does not come from being busy. That is something that served you as potentially an individual contributor as like being super busy getting things done, executing. But that is, no one here is going to be like giving you a round of applause for constantly being like super, super busy, taking on too many tasks, because now you have a team. So all the additional tasks that you take on, your team takes on. And so the other thing is, is like being able to understand that your standards, they can say, hi, you're not lowering your standards by giving up responsibility. By giving your. Your. By being able to give up responsibility to your team, right. And dole out responsibilities versus doing everything yourself.

It doesn't mean that you're lowering the standard. It means that you're raising the capacity and the capabilities of members. You're training them, you're mentoring them, you're developing them. And so it's actually that you are not going to lose the quality of your work just because your, your team is doing it. You're actually going to empower them and train them and coach them and help them become even better. And the last piece is like, you have to be able to embrace this discomfort, this control piece, where if I'm doing it myself and I do everything myself, that I'm able to control the outcomes. Sorry, but like, being a leader requires for you to be a little bit uncomfortable There is some ambiguity.

You have to trust. Others have to also create space and allow them to make mistakes and to grow. And there's a way to do it safely. I had one leader who was always like, but if I let them do it and they mess it up, we're in big trouble. Okay, great. So let's create a system. Let's create a system that this team member will do. The first pass of this, by this deadline, then you're going to come in at that touch point, review it, give feedback, give them a second time to do it, and then they can execute it. The final version. That is. There's ways to allow and empower and teach and coach and mentor other people without creating business risk. It's just about planning and structure. So I just want you to know it's not your job as a leader to prove that you are the most useful.

It is really your job to make your team effective. You're there to remove roadblocks, you're there to remove issues. You're there to hear them out and to hear their solutions and help them if they get stuck. That is really your job is to help your team members shine. Like, no one cares if you're doing it all. What matters if you've developed the team to do it. And so many leaders have this like breakthrough moment when they start to realize that, wait a minute, it's actually about the team and not about me doing everything. It's about me empowering, enabling, not enabling, but you know what I mean? It's me empowering and making them all able to do the things they want to do. And so what can you do?

What changes when leaders stop doing everything? Your team is going to build their confidence. They're going to have ownership over the work that they do. They're going to stop having like feeling like they have to go to you for every little thing and get permission. They're going to start problem solving on their own. You know how amazing it is when you have a team of people who can all creatively problem solve versus it just being your pov? That's how you innovate organizations. That's how you innovate companies. Different backgrounds, different ideas, different cultures, different perspectives. And then you create mental space. It creates mental space for you as a leader to start to think about like what is most important to grow, develop, create vision and strategy that helps you in the long run because you're helping the higher purpose of the organization and yourself develop.

That also creates mental space for your direct reports because now they're stopping worrying about when you're going to come in and micromanage them. And that's how you start to develop leadership presence. Because now you're being seen as a strategist, now you're seeing being seen as a decision maker, a visionary, not just a doer executor. And so that's the biggest thing that happens. This is how my clients get promoted. This is how my clients become better leaders. They are so have had and are used to having leaders who are the micromanagers, who are the ones who are not developing them, the ones who do not care about their perspective. And guess what? They're leaving them, okay? And they're getting new jobs or they're becoming bosses and leaders themselves.

And so I want you, especially if you're like watching this and listening to this, I want you to make this stuff happen for yourself. Because what we need are leaders who actually care about their development that are watching stuff like this. Because let me tell you, managers, bosses, CEOs, leaders, they don't have required leadership training to get promoted. And so it's so funny, the ones that do end up getting promoted and put in leadership positions who end up, I don't know, having their teams with high turnover and burnout. So you be the one that steps up and you be the one who doesn't take everything on but knows how to educate, coach, mentor and train the people that you work with. And so this is what I want you to focus on this week.

So I would love for you to start to build some cement, some momentum when it comes to this. So if you have a team, your early contributor, early individual contributor, even if you are still trying to get into a leadership position, you can still test this out. And if you're somebody who's seasoned and senior, you can still test this out. Because listen, even myself, with all the different kinds of teams that I've hired, developed and trained, I even still sometimes have a little moment where I have to check myself, where I start to get in leads and I start doing everything, okay? So it does not matter if you have had 10 plus 20 plus years in the game when it comes to being a leader, even you, even you know that you can sometimes get in the thick of it and lose sight of being able to empower and mobilize other people, the people that are on your team.

So the first thing I want you to do is I want you to identify one task that you are potentially doing that you know, you don't have to do anymore. Like what is one Task that you don't need to be doing anymore, that you can, you know, go ahead and allocate to somebody on your team. That's the first piece. And the second piece is I want you to clarify with that person, okay, what does a job well done look like at this? Like, what are the expectations for that task? They're taking on timelines, the quality of work, what needs to be done. And then I want you to then allow them to work on it. And I don't want you to like give them answers if there's a problem. I want you to start to meet with them either weekly or bi weekly on how they have taken that on and integrated and transitioned into that, into taking on that task and owning it.

So it could be something as simple as like a report. It could be something as simple as, you know, a workflow that they've been doing. It'd be so simple of something small. But thinking about what that looks like and you know, remember, you don't have to let go of everything at once. Just practice doing this one thing at a time. So you can start to release doing everything yourself and being able to empower others in order to help you. And that's how you really lead with authority, is by building trust and empowering others. And so just know that if leading authority does not come from doing more, it comes from clarity, trust and being able to help others and showcasing that value. And so if you are somebody who is trying to shift from the doing it all person to now the leading person and you want it to be a successful transition to being a leader, or maybe just a little wake up call and a check in.

Know that this is the work that I do within private coaching. So I have amazing clients who have gone from individual contributors to leaders who are seasoned leaders. And they are either developing teams, hiring teams, reinvigorating teams that maybe haven't been performing as well. And I help them when it comes to identifying like themselves, their leadership of what they're trying to develop for themselves and as well as the leadership they can do develop for their teams. And so within private coaching, we work together in order to make this happen in three to six months. Months. com that's-a n I t a n dot com. Go to the contacts page and go ahead and book a call with me. When you book a call with me, you fill out an intake form and then what happens next is we get on a call, we talk about what your goals are, what challenges you're facing, and then I will talk about what it's like to work together in private coaching.

I'll give you a custom plan and then we kick it off from there. My style is very much a mixture of facts and feelings, as all my clients say. And so I will always give you strategy on what it is, it looks like, to what it is you want to achieve. I always give you action items to take away and to work on in order to help develop those things. And my goal is always for you to be able to walk away with some new skills that you develop to help you for a lifetime. That's always my goal. And I always say this about my clients. They're my clients for life. And so I have clients that have worked with me for years. And even if you're not working with me consistently, I still check on you years later.

I had a call earlier today with actually two clients, one that I worked with three years ago and one that I worked with about two years ago. And I still check in because I want to know how you're doing. And so it's always really awesome to hear how much they are, they're thriving, they're doing well, and it's always great to support them. And so, again, if you are curious, you want to learn more, go to my website. But it's been great talking to you and have a great one.